Jun 12, 2007

Ten More Words I Learned in Law School

Here are some more terms and phrases that made law school fun. The definitions may vary from the legal definitions.

Per Autre Vie: Sounds like cheese. Means that you are waiting for someone else to die to get your stuff.

Curtilege: Sounds like spoiled cheese. Means that no one can rummage through your garden hose and potted plants on your porch.

Not a "Search": Sounds simple. Means that while your are coming back from placing your garbage on the curb, Cop #1 can stop you on the sidewalk and ask who won last night's game while Cop #2 goes diving into your trash can, Cop #3 uses binoculars while sitting in the tree house across the street to peek into the undraped window of your upstairs bedroom, Cop #4 can use a thermal scanner to look through the walls of your home, Cop #5 can take Lassie to sniff around you and your home, Cop #6 can take pictures and paint chips from your car, Cop #7 can look through your skylight while hovering in a helicopter over your house, Cop #8 can hop over the back fence of your field and look through the tool shed in the middle of it, Cop #9 can follow your wife home by tailing her car up to the driveway and you can't complain about any of it because it's not a search.

Reasonable person: Sounds reasonable. Means that everyone must act like Ned Flanders.

Imputed Intent: Sounds like something HAL would do. Means that if I miss my target, I'm still in trouble.

Facial Challenge: Sounds like a beauty college fundraiser. Means that I say that a law should be thrown out because it sucks and everyone knows it.

Ouster: Sounds like seafood. Means that I changed the locks and, no, you can't have a copy of the key even though you live here.

Eggshell Plaintiff: Sounds like angry customer at a grocery store. Means that you are pretty much going to have to sell the house to pay for the settlement.

Equitable Servitude: Sounds kinky. Means that you will be forced by the court to tear down that giant totem pole of muppet characters that you built in the front yard.

Fertile Octogenarian: Sounds like a guest on Jerry Springer. Means that the judges from hundreds of years ago believed in Science Fiction.

1 comment:

* meish * said...

love the definitions. i didn't realize i learned so many weird words and phrases in law school. but what's scarier is that it all sounds normal to me!!